Adopt a pasty - The Pasty sells saffron cakes from Cornwall and Cornish pasties

I had a very tasty pasty the other week when I was in St Agnes.

There’s something very special about small village pasties.

That guy’s an inspiration. The way he escapes from the evil Seagulls in Sydney harbour – magnificent!!!

:o)

Pete the Pasty
xXx

I’d always assumed my little sister was a normal Small Steak Pasty, but she’s left Cornwall, moved to Brighton and I’m worried she may have become a really gay pasty like a Chicken Korma Pasty or (god forbid) a Roasted Vegetable and Goats Cheese with Pesto Pasty.

What do I do?

Somebody please advise? Should I confront her about this or treat it as “a phase”?

⁺The contents of this blog aren’t meant to be taken seriously by anyone – especially you. The Pasty.com is an Equal Opportunity Pasty Website^TM and believe that all pasties should have an equal chance to be sold, even really pretentious made-up ones like wot they sell in London. Having said that the most exotic we get is a Chicken Pasty.

Some people have been asking who am I “really”?

I don’t quite understand what they mean???

I’m a Cornish pasty called Pete!!!

I live in a nice house dungeon in Helston with my loving evil step-dad Richard, who runs a website selling orphaned pasties to hungry people up and down the country.

PS: Please don’t tell him about my blog – he wants to sell me into pasty-slavery too :o(

I’ll tell you why.

1) More more people
2) More seagulls
3) More people that want to murder me!!!

:o(

Being a pasty is tough sometimes.

It’s hard being a pasty.

Everyone says they love you, but then what do they do?

They try and eat you – that’s what!!!

Call that love?

I don’t – I call it evil. Would you eat your mum? Would you eat a puppy?

All I want is someone to love me!

Petie

I am a little baby Cornish pasty.

My mummy and daddy died in a freak seagull accident.

Will you be my new mummy or daddy?

I want someone to adopt me and take care of me.